Why not now

Tallulah: Revision 2 is officially underway.

As artists, I think the best and most worthy of our ideas are the ones that show up when we most need them. In the moments when we’re at the end of our tether and know it, sometimes an idea we’ve been uncertain about will suddenly appear to us and bring with it a burst of newfound clarity of purpose that we can use to rejuvenate ourselves. And since that happened today with Tallulah, I decided that it was probably in my best interests to follow through.

Everything I’ve thought about during this 3-month hiatus from revision, everything I knew I liked but wasn’t sure quite how to work with, is now The Plan. I’ll just work with it the same way I work with everything else. I forced myself to write again today, because that’s a thing that I can do even though I don’t have to, and it worked. I have something of a first chapter underway, and it’s got more or less everything that I want in it, is more or less the exact way I want to open this new story.

And it’s definitely a new beginning. I can tell because I don’t know quite what’s going to happen in this chapter once I’ve finished writing it. I have a few ideas, but I don’t know. And I’m going to let myself not know, and just write and find out. Mostly because this is the make-or-break moment for some very old, very troublesome and very resilient parts of the story I wrote that haven’t convinced me to either forsake or preserve them. I’m going to use the writing of this chapter and the way I feel to decide. And if these ideas don’t make it in, I’ll take the hint. Either they don’t work yet, or they don’t work at all.

This is fun.

I’m quite pleased with that.


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