Man, I missed out on that blog award I was nominated for that only gets offered to blogs with under 200 followers. I feel bad about that; it was very cool of the person to nominate me and I just never got around to it. I guess with the year I’ve had that’s pretty reasonable, but I still wish I’d found the time.
And now I have 202 followers and that window of opportunity has closed forever.
I HAVE 202 FOLLOWERS WOOOOOOOOOO
Thanks guys. This is amazing. I don’t think I’ve had 202 people paying attention to me at the same time outside of the theatre, so seriously, thank you. Aside from the “how to improve your web business model” blogs that are all exactly the same, never like comment or reblog anything I do and are just pumping up my follower count to an artificially high level. You guys can suck it. But the rest of you are awesome and dope simultaneously, and I am deeply grateful for your patronage. Even though it doesn’t involve any money for me. I mean, if you wanted to give me money I wouldn’t say no, I am a starving university student after all …
No seriously, thank you all (the above exception does stand, but seeing as they never read this blog anyway it’s kind of a moot point). This is a fantastic way to close out a year where I’ve had a lot of ups and downs but have also been going from strength to strength, discovering my limits and then discovering not only how much farther I’m able to go, but how rewarding it is. And at the same time it’s been a year where I’ve gotten comfortable with my limits, accepted them for what they are and eased up on selling myself short or criticising myself for not being able to do things I, like, can’t do. All around, a pretty good year.
And despite the relative lack of work done on creative projects, I do think this has been one of the best years in my writing career. I’m slowly rediscovering how to write things for fun rather than as critical essays on social issues; don’t get me wrong, I still want to write critical essays on social issues, but I am also excited to feel the permeation in the boundary between them starting to solidify, feeling the spillover from my academic habits into my creative processes beginning to leak back into its proper channel. I don’t think you can be moral without being critical, but I don’t think you can be healthy without having fun. And while being critical can be very fun, when it’s not, you’ve got to admit that it’s not and seek something else. Honesty is the best policy and all that.
It really is.
And I am honestly looking forward to 2015. I felt like a lot of seeds got sown this year, not just in my life but in our culture as well. I am anxious, hopeful and neutrally excited to see what will have happened by this time next year.
But whatever happens – I may no longer be a Writer, but next year I am gonna finish a fucking book. Because why the hell not.