So apparently today I got a little achievement for getting 500 likes on this blog. Thanks guys! I find it hard to believe that anybody even follows this blog (and I know a lot of the blogs that do follow me don’t actually follow me), so I really appreciate the fact that you think what I put up here is worth reading. I mean I’d keep doing it anyway just to vent, but it means a lot to me that you enjoy it, too.
It also reminds me that I was nominated for a blog award some time ago and never got around to participating in it; I really do want to and really appreciate having being nominated, but time has not been on my side for quite some … um … time. Thankfully I now have 4 months off before uni starts again so I can now Do All The Things and whatnot.
One of said things is Nanowrimo. I was already late to the party, and didn’t get started writing when I said I would; I still haven’t sorted the events into chapters so that I can focus my efforts, so that’s what I’m doing today. Also I’ve already gotten almost-sidetracked into a well of endless what-ifs, so while I need to structure, I think my planning phase has to have a full stop applied to it now. The time restriction was fantastic, and since I have this plan with lots of potential in it already written down, I can focus on cutting out the distracting clutter and just writing the bits I find compelling.
It’s the whole perfectionist thing of wanting to “do it right”, “right” here being a metric of my own making that nevertheless feels like it comes with the failure-state of other people looking down on me. And I know it’s true, too; I’ve given myself such a meta story concept to work with that if I’m not amazingly thorough, people will pick holes in it. And even worse, I may not be happy that I explored the concept enough just for my own satisfaction.
But for now it’s a zero draft, and it can be the shittiest story ever committed to text and it’ll still be fantastic, because all it has to be is a fantastic zero draft. So long as it gets written, that’s all that matters, and “getting it right” can come later. True, that’s where I’ve gotten stuck with Tallulah, but there are other factors at play with that story, such as, notably, not really having a story to go along with the premise. This project suffers no such flaw; I most certainly have a story. Whether it’s any good or not – well, only time will tell. For now, I just gotta write it.
I just gotta write it. How hard can that be?