I think I can; I think I can …

I think I can bust out this revision and work on my two research essays without detriment to either undertaking!

I did all the things I had to do by this week; I wanted to send off a draft for one of my course convenors to look over for feedback by today and that didn’t happen, but I have gotten started actually drafting that essay, and like 3 weeks before it’s due, so that is still something to celebrate. I mean for me actually being pro-active and not waiting for last-minute anxiety adrenalin to power my way screaming facefirst into each and every single assignment I ever do is basically discovering that I was born under a red sun. I’ll take it.

And also because this oral presentation is out of the way, I can oh wait FUCK I still need to compile my blog posts for the other paper … ugh …

But even then, that’s not going to take more than a couple of hours; I can “narrativise” it if I wish, but maybe I don’t wish, who knows, I might do anything, I’m a wildcard man I can’t be tamed, also I need to buy one of the films I want to write about but because it’s a cool movie that’s not such a big deal I guess, just that I have to spend some of my student money on a thing, which is never a happy occasion.

And then, post-Halloween, I’ll be doing Nanowrimo, steaming ahead with my indulgent YA novel – which I will actually plot out – and proving that I can actually write an entire draft of a novel in just a month, and that I don’t have to take a whole year about it. That will feel very good.

And then after that I’ll finally have time to read all of those books I own and have not yet read, finally find a way to articulate my thoughts and feelings about Vampire Academy, I don’t know why but I just really have a lot to say about the first book especially; and I may even have enough momentum at that point to throw some stuff up on YouTube and even record my Darth Vader rap, which I conceived of in 2010, I think.

And also draw and play guitar and SO MANY THINGS WILL I DO YES MMM

It’s exciting.

And I think, also, I’m coming to terms with the fact that Tallulah is just kind of not a fantastic story, just a bundle of good ideas that I can cram into a roughly cohesive narrative and send out into the world. I think I’m just about ready to accept that; the important thing is to get it done instead of trying to make it perfect. I mean I have problems with all of my favourite stories told by other people; why not allow my own to have a couple of flaws?

I’m feeling good right now, and so good that I can probably capitalise on it big-time. And since I’ve had these moments before and let them slip by without making use of them, I’m going to stop blogging now and actually go do something about it.


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